Conspiracy Theories

No one likes a good Conspiracy Theory more than I do. In fact, it's best you don't get me started cos it's one of those things I can talk about for hours.

Some of the more common conspiracy theories are the JFK Assasination, the Fake Moon Landing, 9-11 , The Da Vinci code, UFOs, The Iraq war etc, etc.

Ever watched "King of the Hill"? Well, the character Dale Gribble
is always obsessed by conspiracy theories. He's hilarious.

Here is a collection of Dale Gribble quotes from wikiquote:

• "I blame the media-blamers."
• "Hank, It's 3AM and someone invades your home. How are you going to shoot him?"
• (watching as Bill is pecked by dale's pet falcon) "Oh, he came home."
• "I killed eight gophers last year and a purebred Tennesse walking horse that was looking at me funny."
• (throws a knife and hits a mannequin) "Get away from my wife or next time I'll aim for the mannequin and hit you."
• "Boil up some Mountain Dew; it's gonna be a long night." ("Dog Dale Afternoon")
• "I know what's wrong with it. It's a Ford. You know what they say Ford stands for don't ya? 'Fix it again, Tony'." ("Chasing Bobby")
• (on the Hills' answering machine) "You don't know who I am, but I know where you live sex ed teacher and you better cut it out if you know what's good for you. Oh and Hank, we changed that tee off time to three o'clock." ("Square Peg")
• "I'm the albino indian, deal with it."
• "If you want to elect me, Dale Gribble, president of the Gun Club, running on the Save-Your-Sorry-Ass platform, say aye."
• (to Joseph) "You're like E.T., except E.T. was a purebred alien with a heart of gold. You're only half-alien and at times can be a tad self-centered." ("Of Mice and Little Green Men")
• "Hank, you were right! The Cubans have my mower!" ("Dog Dale Afternoon")
• "I've taken two oaths in my life: One to the NRA, and the other to Nancy Hicks Gribble, nee Nancy Hicks. I stood in front of God and all my friends, vowing to be an honorable and truthful man. So I'm not gonna lie to you, I have felt a small, insect-like attraction for you. But my wife is the greatest woman there ever was!"
• "... sounds like helicopters, UN helicopters". ("Pilot")
• "That's code for U.N. commissars telling Americans what temperature it's gonna be in our outdoors. I say, let the world warm up! See what Boutros Boutros-By-Golly thinks about that! We'll grow oranges in Alaska!" ("Pilot")
• "So it turns out I'm not the actual Dale Gribble, but a clone of him. The original Dale Gribble is a super-warrior from the year 2087. The second me, i.e. I, was created to help the first me fight the invading Mongol armies." ("The Incredible Hank")
• "Hey, I know what's wrong with your truck. It's your quote-unquote 'pollution control'. I heard on talk radio you don't even need 'em. They're just an egghead government plot." ("Pilot")
• "Open up your eyes, man! They're trying to control global warming! Get it? GLO-BAL!" ("Pilot")
• "Whoa! Hold on, son! I want you to keep an open mind so you can make an informed decision! If you want, you can read a bloated government report on smoking, or go straight to the horse's mouth and get the facts from the tobacco industry." (he reads the aforementioned tobacco industry-funded report on smoking)
• "Wingo!"
• "Wait a minute. Every time I leave, you call John Redcorn. I know what's going on here. Your headaches are a desperate bid for my attention. But what do I do? I pawn you off on some Indian healer so I can have my Dale time at the gun club, or breeding show turtles, or on the Internet investigating unexplained phenomenona. God, I am so selfish!" ("Nancy's Boys")
• "SHI-SHI-SHAAA!"
• "They wanted to see me wet my pants from fear... but they're too late!" ("Dog Dale Afternoon")
• "Guns don't kill people. The government does!"
• "Gentlemen, the crap has literally been scared out of me."
• (after drinking tainted beer) "Step on it, Bill! I don't know which way it's coming out, but it's coming out!" ("Beer and Loathing")
• (after a trampoline falls on his foot) "Aah! This is a sign that we have been playing God with Buckley's trampoline and now God is playing God with us and He's a whole lot better at it. I refuse to touch this porthole to hell!"
• (trying to open a locked door): "This door seems to be equipped with some sort of anti-opening device."
• (after seeing Willie Nelson knocked out): "Check his pockets for cigarettes." ("Hank's Got The Willies")
• (after having a muffin knocked out of his hands) MY MUFFIN!!!?!?!?!?!
• (after exhaling a puff of smoke) My throat's on fire!
• (after Dale tells his Falcon to retrieve him a vole, and it immediately attacks Bill)"...So Bill's a vole."
• (Seeing Hank come in with a food dish) Whatd'ya got under the foil Mr. Party Pooper, some party poop? ("A Firefighting We Will Go")
• "I'm too pretty to go to jail!!!"
• "S'GO!"
• (after Hank telling him to come down from a clock tower before someone gets hurt) "Too late, I killed Shackleford! No...wait, correction, Shackleford wants a pizza. (Dog Dale Afternoon)

I even found Fahrenheit 9/11 pretty interesting, although, what is just as interesting is the amount of people that HAVEN'T watched it because "oh that movie is just a load of shit". Interesting conclusions people make without actually seeing it themselves. I must admit, Michael Moore seems to rub most people the wrong way.

A few Christmases ago, Mrs T bought me a real high quality book of the NASA photographs from some of the apollo missions. Really interesting, I can stare at that stuff for hours, and now that so many people question if the moon landing was actually real, those pics are particularly interesting to look at.
One of the fascinating things about the internet is that people with particular interests in things find it so much easier to research and collaborate with others in pursuit of "The Truth". But, there is so much crap out there also, that we are bombarded with information to the point where basically anything can be proven via sources somewhere on the web.
For example, there are several sites detailing the Fake Moon Landing, such as Cosmicapollo. I was very surprised when I was googling this stuff to find NASA themselves have a fairly decent article on the alleged Hoax also: The Great Moon Hoax

Here is a particularly convincing fake moon landing site.

The most disturbing thing I find with NASA's version of events is the fact that they left 12 perfectly functioning Hassleblad 500EL bodies AND their lenses right up there on the moon. Those things are really expensive, so right there, you've gotta think that no one in their right mind would do that. So I reckon NASA must be full of shit.

Oddly enough, whenever I was researching Conspiracy Theories today using Google, my PC would slow right down......kinda like........I am being watched. Hmmm. Other searches were fine.
(you try Googling "Hasselblad" and then "Hassleblad Moon". Check out the time difference - Maybe it's just me). Hmmm.

Wait, there is a knock at the d

Conspiracy Theory wiki
King of the Hill Official site
King of the Hill fan multi-media site
Full Moon Book
Hassleblad site
Michael Moore's site